This week in my Family Relations class, we discussed a question that is very significant to me. Who is affected by small families? There are so many thoughts that were drawn to my mind as I explored various answers to this question. Along with that question, came another question. Is it really anyone else's business if I (or anyone else) decides to have few children or none at all? At first glance, the answer to this question seems quite simple. No. It isn't anyone's business. No one but me, my spouse, and my Heavenly Father. However, there is more to it than that. Although the decision of how many children to have is ultimately a very private matter, there are other people who are affected by these significant choices.
So. Who is affected when we decide to have small families? The easiest answer for me is the child. This answer came to me so easily partially from personal experience. I come from a moderate sized family. I have three siblings who were the very first friends that I had as a child. I have cousins who helped me through some significant trials. I have aunts and uncles, grandmas and grandpas who loved and cared for me and ultimately helped to shape me into the adult that I am today. I cannot imagine what it would be like if the generations before me had chosen to have small families. I imagine those people that I love so dearly, those aunts and uncles and cousins, disappearing and my support system dwindling down to almost nothing. It feels lonely when I picture it. The bonds that are formed with family members are bonds that cannot be formed by an outside friendship.
Parents, although not immediately, are affected by this decision as well. Thinking about our distant future is not something that we always want to do, as it can be a scary thought. However, imagine for a minute that you decide not to have any children. 60 years down the road, are you going to have anyone to care for you and make sure that you are comfortable in your aging life? Your children are going to be some of the people that you rely on most. They will love you and care about your well being. Although there are people who are paid to take care of the elderly, relationships with humans who know you and care about you are going to be much more important. It would be wise to think about the distant future when deciding how many children to have.
This last part is a little bit difficult for some people to think about, but society is affected by our decision of how many children to have. Something that we discussed in class is the fact that fertility is dropping. Many people are choosing to have less children than necessary to reach replacement. This means that populations are declining. How is this a negative thing? Well, something that I had to learn in order to understand this is human capital. Human capital is defined as the skills, knowledge, and experience possessed by an individual or population, viewed in terms of their value or cost to an organization or country. If the population is decreasing, this means that human capital is also decreasing. We need to have children who are raised in a way that helps them to be responsible and valuable to society as adults. We need hard workers and we need innovators.
I want to end by letting everyone know that I do believe that this is a decision that should be personal and private. Every circumstance is different. Every Family is Different. And that's okay because it is part of the beauty that is the family. I believe that there is "value in families."
